'Get in the Habit' of summing up Synergy, Habit #6

Habit #6 is to Synergize; which also stands for creative cooperation. You must learn to value other's differences by becoming the "spirit of reverence and respect." It is basically the 3rd alternative in all difficult situations. The barriers to face with this habit have to deal with your character, listening skills (or lack thereof) and of course WIN-LOSE systems - meaning this habit deals closely with Habit #4 Mutual Benefit.

The principle of synergizing is that the whole is greater than the sum of it's parts; meaning that the paradigm is that together we can create a better way, a higher way, than alone. In order to change your behaviour to achieve this habit you must value & celebrate differences and practise cooperation. This results in...

• innovation and invention,
• new and better solutions,
• transformed relationships
• and an appreciation of diverse perspectives.

"People who are truly effective have the humility and reverence to recognize their own perceptual limitations. And appreciate the rich resources available through interaction with the hearts and minds of other human beings." 

Synergizing (Creative Cooperation) is the process that creates new possibilities in benefit of both sides involved. As with finding mutual benefit you must look for the third alternative in every situation or conflict.

Check your willingness...
Be willing to search for a third solution that is better than what either of you has in mind alone.
Reflect both viewpoints...
Restate the other's opinion to his/her satisfaction to make sure you have understood properly before you state your own.
Create new ideas...
Propose and refine new ideas until you both arrive at a third alternative.

The Third Alternative

It takes a lot of internal security; beginning with the spirit of adventure and discovery - eager to cooperate. You have to learn to step out of your comfort zone (whether that be your controlling or compromising personality traits.) But by becoming a pathfinder to new possibilities you will both create a third alternative.

You will both have a change of heart and feel new energy and excitement created with your mutual benefit. You will see things in a new way as your relationship is transformed and less stressful and complicated. And finally, you will both end up with an idea that is better than what either of you started with (kind of like the expectations of a brainstorming session.)

Up Next: '...and it's sweet, sweet, Sweet (Public) Victory'