'Tis the Season for Magical Memoirs...

After a lovely 3-hour flight (that I mostly slept through... after having a wonderful conversation with an older couple from Stratford area,) and being delayed from leaving the plane for almost 40min because of a wonderfully missed Canadian snow storm freezing the boarding bridge... I'm finally home, rested, distressed and back to my wonderful world of cats, cleanliness, family, friends, Tim Hortons, Ketchup Chips, Mars bars, Smarties (NOT Rockets,) and Canadian hospitality!

All I wanted from Santa this year was the chance to share with future ICP students of the adventures they will have if they choose to contend in the program, so without further adieu here is one of my final accounts from the Disney International Exchange Program of 2013.

Please stay tuned for more videos of my time there in the New Year, and the upcoming jump back into the world of college life & advertising!

The Facts don't Lie about the Difference you can Make

Blogging is one of the best ways to communicate your creativity, knowledge, advice and stories with other people in a vast way. It can be used just for personal or family use, to educate the public or to enhance your business. It is also very hard to keep up with; it takes a lot of self-motivation to keep up with it consistently and to find topics to write about (another reason why I have various different categories to write about in case I get stuck on one.)

I wanted to show you how much blogging does make a difference. Online communication is a great way to see how many people your messages really get to. Just like an advertising campaign blogging websites can track all sorts of different facts about your viewers to let you see that people really are paying attention to what you're saying.

This posts isn't necessarily informative, but more like a little ray of 'inspirational hope' to my other fellow bloggers that people are paying attention - even if it seems no one is or no one bothers to comment or share your posts.

Today I found out that most of the viewers from my blog are actually American.

This doesn't really surprise me because since coming in June on the Disney ICP Program I have been blessed with many new friends, co-cast members and managers that have taken a liking to my blog.

Other countries have surprised me... such as Malaysia, Lithuania, Germany, Australia, France and Denmark.

Another great thing about online communication is that Google now let's you translate your blogs so that you have the opportunity to have so many viewers from around the world that speak multiple languages.

Next I made a list of the websites that either have 'ads' about my blog posts and the 'search words' that people have been typing into search engines that bring up my blog posts the most.

 

Finally, I made a list of the most viewed posts I have done in the now 3rd years of my blog (awe I think its going to be time for a birthday celebration soon...) If you see a post you haven't read yet, please feel free to poke around and see what you can find.

Every once in a while it's just good to step back and realize that what you're saying is being heard and not to give up even when it seems pointless. I for one take time every now and then to search new blogs and read what they have to say - so you never know I may find yours one day so keep writing!

Graduation, Review & Reflection... the Saw Sharpening Finale

As we attempt to renew ourselves regularly, we will face obstacles along the way - such as lack of motivation, self-discipline or confidence. Life tends to speed up and get too busy for self-reflection, especially in hard or trying times...

 

Be Strong in Hard Moments

Create for yourself a 'weekly compass' to keep you on track when your getting stressed out. Think about what the one important thing is that you have to do during that week. Always think of Quadrant 1 and 2 instead of 3 and 4...

Include goals such as getting up on time "mind over mattress," disciplining yourself to eat healthier, learning to control your temper a little more every day & sticking to your daily regimen even when you get rushed.

The final chapters of Covey's books review what you should work on within all the habits to create your own personal profile of yourself (this includes your Emotional Bank Account, your Personal Mission Statement and all the other values/goals we have determined through the 7 Habits.)

Work from the Inside-Out

The Inside-Out approach (or in other words the transition between Private to Public victory,) focusses on personal effectiveness preceding interpersonal effectiveness. One must be achieved before the other. By improving ourselves first, we can then help others.

 

Focus on your Circle of Influence

When you look upon your concerns you have to realize there are some things that we cannot control - such as the people around us. The things outside our control are in our Circle of Concern. You need to be patient and learn not to focus all your energy on trying to fix this circle and instead focus on your Circle of Influence. When you focus more on what you can influence you will find that your concerns get smaller.

Continuously Work to Change habits

To form effective habits Covey suggest you only need 3 elements... desire, knowledge and skill. Without desire you will not truly wish to change. Without knowledge, you will not know why or what you need to change. And without skill you will not be able to carry out a course of correction.

"We first make our habits, and then our habits make us."

I hope that through our journey together into the works & teachings of Dr. Stephen Franklin Covey, you have learned so much more than you expected.
Some of these habits were already known to me, others I have struggled to work on, and others I have denied for some years.. I know this will be the case for some of you and I hope that it never has to be again now that we have all transitioned into more effective people together.

As you continue to 'sharpen your saw of skills' please don't forget to look back on all the habits and experience we've learned about here together...

Beginning - Dependence
1 - Be Proactive
2 - Begin with the End in Mind
3 - Put First things First
Transition to Independence
4 - Think Win-Win
5 - Seek First to Understand to be Understood
6 - Synergize
Ending - Interdependence
7 - Sharpen the Saw

"A long, healthy and happy life is the result of making contributions, of having meaningful projects that are personally exciting and contribute to & bless the lives of others" - Hans Selye

Please feel free to leave your comments on Stephen Covey's teachings or any experiences you have had during our journey. Or if you have any questions about Stephen Covey or if you want me to read and cover any more of his work.

'Get in the Habit' of Sharpening your Skills... I mean the Saw, Habit #7

The final habit of highly effective people is the practise of 'Renewal.' One of Stephen Covey's favourite and most remembered sayings was that "the Key to the many, is the one."

The principle being to maintain and increase effectives, we must renew ourselves in body, heart, mind & soul. The paradigm for 'Sharpening the Saw' is that "I nurture the goose that lays the golden eggs." Does anyone else remember that saying?

The behaviour we must follow to achieve this habit is to renew regularly in the four skills dimensions & to be strong in hard moments.

The results of this practise will be an improved capacity of stronger relationships (continuously,) greater reserves and continuous improvement of all things.

Renew Regularly your Four Skills Dimensions

These dimensions make up every task or emotion that contributes to our daily lives (and the other 6 habits.) They are physical, social/emotional, mental & spiritual.

When sharpening the saw it's important to take time now and then for self-reflection in how you are doing in these aspects of your life to see if you are on the right track, or need some reconstruction.

One - Physical

This dimension focusses on exercise, nutrition, getting enough rest, stress management & economic health. Irregular reflection of this dimension typically leads to depression.
This is most hard to follow in college life; where students stress about academics, family, finances, social status, new experiences and future plans.
Here are some tips to renew yourself physically...

• Get the amount of sleep you know you need (most people say between 7-9 hours no more or less)
• Set health and fitness goals (if you have to - but stick to them) train to run a marathon or set a goal for your weight or cholesterol
• Eat more vegetables, fruits, whole grains, fiber and drink lots of water
• When you exercise make sure it includes flexibility, strength & cardiovascular endurance training as well
• Reduce stress by eliminating any Quadrant 3 activities taking up 'urgent clutter'

Two - Social & Emotional

This dimension focusses on consistent deposits in your Emotional Bank Account of key relationships (and trust) in your life.

If by chance everything you say could be heard (for a day) by everyone, would you choose your words differently?

Here are some tips to renew yourself socially & emotionally...

• Keep your relationships in constant repair
• Value the differences in others and the opportunities that arise
• Practise your listening with the people around you
• Widen your circle of friends by forgiving yourself and others who have hurt you (a task I find one of the most hardest to do in our generation..)
• Build family relationships stronger - immediate and extended
• Let go of any damaging competitive feelings you may have towards others

Three - Mental

This dimension focusses on your talents; reading, writing, learning and continuous study. If your current skills were to become obsolete, would you learn more..?
Here are some tips to renew yourself mentally...

• Keep a journal (textile or electronic)
• Read voraciously! Stephen Covey specifically suggests that if you don't know what that word means.. then you should start reading immediately
• Develop a hobby - it allows you to do something you love even if it doesn't end up your job or career
• Continue your education; train your mind to stop every now and then to examine its own paradigm (I believe you can never stop learning no matter what age)

Four - Spiritual

The final dimension focusses on service, value clarification, inspiring literature, meditation & nature.
Giving a service can improve your health; volunteering is good for not only your heart but your immune system, rejuvenation and fight off sickness. Amazing things happen when you not only have a positive outlook on yourself but on others around you too.
The average person works about 11,000 days between their mid-20s until age 65... what legacy do you want to leave during that time?
Here are some tips to renew yourself spiritually...

• Create, review and refine your Personal Mission Statement
• Watch, listen and enjoy the world of nature (I started when I moved to Kingston, I never knew how beautiful city-life could be. Now I try to take a walk in the park at least 2-3 times a week after my classes)
• Read some inspiring literature or specifically the biographies of the authors or people who inspire you
• Commit to a life of total integrity to your priorities (I know sounds like a BIG commitment huh?)
• Practise spiritual worship.... OK or at least listen to inspiration/uplifting music
• Commit to serve your community; no less than 1-3 times a year

Finally, you have now completely your transition into a highly effective person! Up next is the final chapter in our Stephen Covey experience...

Final Chapter: Graduation, Review & Reflection... the Saw Sharpening Finale

 

'...and it's sweet, sweet, Sweet (Public) Victory'... into Interdependence

Once you have overcome the next 3 habits, Think Win-Win, Seek First to Understand to be Understood & Synergize you have now achieved the Public Victory.

This means that you have transitioned from being independent to becoming interdependent.

By gaining a higher sense of interdependence you can now not only rely on yourself with more confidence but rely on others mutually - balancing out each other's dependence.
You should now trust in your own capabilities and even more so in other's strengths as well.

"Self-mastery and self-discipline are the foundation of good relationships with others."

As with the Private Victory you must always keep your Emotional Bank Account strong.

This includes remember the 3-5:1 ratio rule; It may take between three to five deposits to make up for one withdrawal.
Remember what one person think's is a deposit may be considered a withdrawal to another. You need to remember patience and forgivingness.
And be sincere and consistent in your deposits. Small deposits over time can build into large account balances after all.

"See every problem as an opportunity to exercise creative energy & Always start every endeavor with a clear sense of purpose."

Up Next if the 7th and final Habit of Stephen Covey's Highly Effective People. I hope through these posts I have helped you learn a few things about the world, the people around you and yourself - I know I have!
Please feel free to comment about your transitions through thee blogs or any other self-awakening experiences you may have had. (Don't forget to brush up on your missing habits if you haven't already)

Up Next: 'Get in the Habit' of Sharpening your Skills... I mean the Saw

 

'Get in the Habit' to Understand before being Understood, Habit #5

Ah, the habit of Mutual Understanding; the principle of this practise being to communicate effectively you must first understand each other. The paradigm being 'I listen with the intent to understand' and NOT to 'listen with the intent to reply.'

Your behaviour should be to "diagnose before you prescribe," meaning to listen empathetically to your speaker and to seek to be understood from the other's perspective.

'Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb

 The result of your good listening? A greater influence with others, solutions to complex problems, clarity on real issues and faster problem solving.

This habit is one of the most important to me; So many friends and come in and out of my life that need to diligently practise this habit.

No one wants to hang out or be around someone who constantly talks with no intent to let the other speak.

Or when they do let the other speak, they don't listen to what is being said because they are too busy thinking about what they are going to say next.

I've stopped seeing friends who act like this, and truth be told a large percentage of girls always act like this...

Having a conversation with someone shouldn't be a competition to see who can get the most words out first.

"When I ask you to listen and you start giving advice, you have not done what I have asked. When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings. When I ask you to listen and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, you have failed me, strange as it may seem. Listen! All I asked is that you listen; not talk or do - just hear me." - Ralph Roughton, M.D.

Diagnose Before You Prescribe

Most people don't take the time to think about a diagnosis before prescribing a solution. They jump to conclusions and assume they understand in order to get out their personal opinion or advice faster.

'To Listen with a Virtuous Heart'

Empathic Listening is reflecting on what a person feels and says, in your own words.
To first listen with your ears, watch with your eyes and understand with your heart before you reply.

Many people in my life misunderstand listening with emotion. If I realize that I wont get much talking or understanding from a conversation then I 'give up' and just let the other continue to talk. Once they realize that I am not actively contributing to the conversation they see it as I am upset or not feeling well. They ask 'what's wrong?" and I say nothing, because I have decided to listen to them instead of over-exert myself trying to speak over them or interrupt them... Ain't nobody got time for that!

Can you think of a time  when the person or group you were with failed to understand before being understood? Can you think of a moment when you may have failed while talking to someone else? Are you a 'conversation-controller' or a 'conversation-listener'? Please feel free to comment with your insights and stories :)

Up Next: 'Get in the Habit' of summing up Synergy!

 

'Get in the Habit' of summing up Synergy, Habit #6

Habit #6 is to Synergize; which also stands for creative cooperation. You must learn to value other's differences by becoming the "spirit of reverence and respect." It is basically the 3rd alternative in all difficult situations. The barriers to face with this habit have to deal with your character, listening skills (or lack thereof) and of course WIN-LOSE systems - meaning this habit deals closely with Habit #4 Mutual Benefit.

The principle of synergizing is that the whole is greater than the sum of it's parts; meaning that the paradigm is that together we can create a better way, a higher way, than alone. In order to change your behaviour to achieve this habit you must value & celebrate differences and practise cooperation. This results in...

• innovation and invention,
• new and better solutions,
• transformed relationships
• and an appreciation of diverse perspectives.

"People who are truly effective have the humility and reverence to recognize their own perceptual limitations. And appreciate the rich resources available through interaction with the hearts and minds of other human beings." 

Synergizing (Creative Cooperation) is the process that creates new possibilities in benefit of both sides involved. As with finding mutual benefit you must look for the third alternative in every situation or conflict.

Check your willingness...
Be willing to search for a third solution that is better than what either of you has in mind alone.
Reflect both viewpoints...
Restate the other's opinion to his/her satisfaction to make sure you have understood properly before you state your own.
Create new ideas...
Propose and refine new ideas until you both arrive at a third alternative.

The Third Alternative

It takes a lot of internal security; beginning with the spirit of adventure and discovery - eager to cooperate. You have to learn to step out of your comfort zone (whether that be your controlling or compromising personality traits.) But by becoming a pathfinder to new possibilities you will both create a third alternative.

You will both have a change of heart and feel new energy and excitement created with your mutual benefit. You will see things in a new way as your relationship is transformed and less stressful and complicated. And finally, you will both end up with an idea that is better than what either of you started with (kind of like the expectations of a brainstorming session.)

Up Next: '...and it's sweet, sweet, Sweet (Public) Victory'

 

November Nuances

As the time on my Disney International Exchange Program is coming to an end, we find ourselves going to our last Florida State University Intercultural Communications class already. Our final assignment for the class is to write a report about our overall internship experience here at Walt Disney World...

For your reading pleasure I have posted it here, although I've made some alterations due to confidentiality of my other cast members :)

My goals for this experience were to gain as many intercultural friends as possible, and to make some business contacts if I could. I have already cemented a plethora of friendships with people from Japan, China, South Korea, New Zealand, Turkey, Africa (and of course America.) I have become very close friends with many of my managers/coordinators at work who support me and want me to come back.

I have made many friends who want a partnership in my dream business-goal of starting my own theatre company one day. Many of these friends want to visit me in Canada and a few of my roommates are already planning we should all visit each other in a few years.

I have successfully learned most common phrases in Cantonese, some Mandarin and a small bit of Korean. I have learned so much about Chinese, Japanese and Korean culture, lifestyle and cooking. Many of my friends are planning for me to visit them for my 25^th birthday in a few years.

Through all of these experiences I have learned more about my own communication and leadership skills and that I do love the concept of international communication and relations. I feel like I have grown to become a very easily approachable person and friend and a respectable hard worker.

My main goal was to better myself by learning all and everything I could from this opportunity and I feel like during these past 6 months I have done that with no regrets.

I learned that I am completely in love with business; I have always loved the Walt Disney Company not only for its entertainment but for its business as well. Working here has given me a behind the scenes chance to fall in love with both of these sides of Disney. It has also rekindled my love for theatre and performance in general as it has taken a hiatus in my life due to other pressing matters.
I learned that I am a very responsible person, always being the one to fall back for other enjoyment or experiences and being the one to always think of the realistic outcomes and taking precautions.

One of the things that surprised me about the Walt Disney Company is its involvement in social responsibility. They are highly involved with children and the environment.

Through taking these classes (and the research provided) I have learned what a great company Disney is behind the scenes rather than on it as well. They care so much about the environment and the future health of our children and supporting local economies as well as safety and diversity.

3 Recommendations for the future of the Disney ICP Program...

1 - My first recommendation would be to first and foremost renovate the Vista Way complex. "This complex has the cheapest rent out of the 4 for a reason I have now learned." The maintenance & cleaning staff should be more precautious in making sure that these rooms/apartments are fit for human living. Everyone world-wide knows that Disney makes enough money that they cannot complain it would be a waste to set up these remodels or fixes every other few years or so.

2 - My second recommendation is that you should not have to fill out your DORMS roommate paperwork before a week before you come to Disney on your ICP program, many of my friends and I would’ve been better off to live together because they are more cleanly and understanding of my nut allergy than some of the roommates I had on this program. Many of my fellow program students have been stressed out or upset with their living situations. And the only solution Disney gives is to either be relocated after your 21^st birthday  (because there are wellness and non-wellness 'alcohol-friendly' apartments,) or if you have a medical condition your roommates are not complying with.  If any students wish to move it should be their choice – it’s not like Disney would have to give a service because when students do get relocated they have to carry and move their own belongings. Most would be willing to pay a fee if just to be able to move once through their program.

3 - My third recommendation would be to monitor their bus companies more closely in order to keep the confusion and frustration to a low. Transtar has given many students problems and through my 6 months I have grown tired of talking about, dealing with and experiencing this frustration. (Don't worry future CP's Disney has already stated that they are getting their own private Disney Transportation for future years... lucky!)

Advice for any future ICP students...

I would tell any student wishing to take this opportunity to go for it – take every chance that comes to you. Meet anyone and everyone. Take the time to learn from other people about their countries and culture because they may invite you to visit one day. Become friends with your managers and they will support the choices you make and help you go further. Be accepting to the diversity and culture that Disney has to offer.

Go to parties and experience new things BUT always remember who you are and the precaution needed when in a different country. Never forget the values and morals that are dear to you and don’t get caught up in changing just because you’re “on vacation” or think that these 6 months are your fresh start.

Take advantage of the discounts and free passes – take pictures, meet characters, go to events and make the guests always feel as welcome as possible. Treat your fellow cast with as much respect as you do your own family (even if they may not deserve it at the time.) Never stop smiling because even if it isn’t said all the time, people do take notice. Always ask for extra tasks and to help out whenever you can – people appreciate it more than you know.

Be professional to everyone you meet because many Disney managers and “big-wigs” dress like regular cast members so you never know who you just helped pargo to the cafeteria or open the door for. Always be thankful for the road that took you here and the road that’s before you.

Detailing the Disney Experience (so far)

For our fourth Intercultural Communications assignment we were asked to write a story about your experience at Disney that could be shared with a friend or close family member that sums up some significant part of your experience in the U.S. For your reading pleasure I have posted it here, although some alterations have been made due to confidentiality of my other cast members :)

While working backstage there is always something to do; you can help clean pen and marker ink (among other stains) out of characters clothing, accessories & fur. (Stitch, Phineas and Ferb like to go crazy with autograph signing.) Or clean and organize shoes or all the drawers full of accessories, performing tights, leotards or ‘winter wear.’ There is always laundry to do whether you like it or not and you can always ask your coordinator for odd jobs or ask anyone else if they need help.

As with any company, older staff with higher seniority become ‘stuck in their ways;’ they either try to take advantage of the new CPs and ICPs and get them to do their work for them or they get lazy and don’t do any work at all. I try to stay positive, I keep away from the ‘notorious staff’ and I find myself jobs to do.

I strive to keep laundry as efficient as possible and I’m always first to start cleaning. I take it upon myself to keep the drawers and bins of clothing organized and the lines tidy for when characters or performers need help. I check costume material for safety (some accessories or clothing has wires...etc. hidden inside them and it’s our job to continuously check if they start to stick out or get sharp.) I always check if there are any characters that want to ‘take a bath’ or need brushing or re-styling.

I received a Fanatic card for helping one of my coordinators; she rarely had to work a track like an actual costuming host and was feeling “very discouraged by it.” So I offered to help her and she was very appreciative.

Whenever new ICPs come to the character room I try to go out of my way to make them feel welcome and help them out when they have questions or forget any procedures. The day before one of my co-workers started working at Fantasmic I took the time to explain the show and procedures to her, and even introduce her to the friends that perform with Mickey at the show so that she would be less intimidated.

I have taken it upon myself to try to learn from this experience as much as possible; I have made many close friends from Asia and I always treat them with the utmost respect and interest. I have taken these past months to learn how to speak Cantonese, Mandarin and some Korean as well. I’m usually the interpreter when it comes to translating between the Spanish, Chinese and Japanese speaking coordinators/cast members when they need help explaining something into English.

I have made very good friends already from China, South Korea and Japan. I have also made friends from New Zealand, England and Alaska as well as Spanish speaking friends as well. I always ask them to teach me things about their culture and lifestyles and am eager to try to news or help them cook and view their photo albums and customs.

When we were at Florida State University I volunteered to help our Macau students cook dinner for us; we made several dishes and I enjoyed having the girls teach me how to fold dumplings and what everything meant and was used for. I learned about how the cook and the uses for each food product.

During my time on the program I've taken the initiative to document my adventures for family, friends & public. I keep an online blog and YouTube channel which I post to regularly. I talk about our FSU classes, different aspects of Disney’s organizational structure & working environments (all within their code of ethics as to not get terminated.) I've had many friends, co-workers & management view my posts, being very impressed, as well as business professionals seeking me out. I even had a girl from Peru view my video and email me asking me to help explain some of the internship programs more.

'Get in the Habit' of Thinking Win-Win, Habit #4 of Mutual Benefit

And here starts round 2 of your transition into becoming the most highly effective you, possible! Stephen Covey's fourth Habit is the 'golden rule' of mutual benefit & abundance...

"What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for each other?" - George Eliot

The principle behind this habit is that effective long-term relationships of any kind require mutual respect and mutual benefit.

The paradigm for 'thinking win-win' is of scarcity; 'there is plenty out there for everyone, and more to spare' vs. thinking ineffectively which would be 'there is only so much, and the more you get, the less there is more me.'

The behaviour needed to achieve this habit is balancing courage and consideration, while also creating win-win agreements and systems. This results in faster solutions to problems, more team involvement and cooperation, a greater spirit of generosity which builds richer relationships.

Courage...

is the willingness and ability to speak your thoughts and feelings.

Consideration...

is the willingness and ability to seek and listen to others' thoughts and feelings with respect.

Think about the relationships you have with coworkers,  close friends or  family members. How do you typically interact with these people?

Do you bicker and argue until someone gives up? Do you compromise? Or do you never even let the other get a word in edge-wise?

 

The Six Paradigms of Human Interaction (Agreements Systems)

LOSE-WIN Characteristics: I always get stepped on...

• voices no standards, no demands or expectations for anyone else,
• is quick to please or appease,
• and buries a lot of feelings internally

LOSE-LOSE Characteristics: If I'm going down, you're going down with me...

• is the mindset of a highly defensive individual,
• nobody benefits from the situation making a complete 'no win,'
• and is the long-term result of 'win-lose' or 'win' systems.

WIN - LOSE Characteristics: I'm going to beat you no matter what...

• is very common scripting for most people,
• is the authoritarian approach to most situations,
• uses position, power, credentials, possessions or personality to get 'the win.'

WIN-WIN or NO DEAL Characteristics: Let's find a solution for both of us, or let's not play...

• allows each party to say no,
• is the most realistic approach at the beginning of every situation,
• is the highest form of WIN-WIN systems.

WIN Characteristics: As long as I win, I don't care if you win or lose...

• very self-centred,
• thinks of themselves first,
• and doesn't care if the other person wins or gets hurt.

WIN-WIN Characteristics: Let's find a solution that works for both of us...
is cooperative and not competitive,
and listens more to be able to communicate longer and with more courage.



 

Up Next: 'Get in the Habit' to Understand before being Understood

 

'...and it's sweet, sweet, Sweet Victory, yeah'... into Independence

"The private Victory must precede the Public Victory. You can't invert that process any more than you can harvest before you plant."

Once you have achieved your private victory of overcoming the first 3 Habits of Being Proactive, Beginning with the end in mind & putting first things first you have now achieved a private victory.

This means you have now transitioned from being dependant on others and your situations/circumstances to being independent. By achieving a higher sense of independence you have raised your trustworthiness as well as your confidence.

The private victory means that you can now 'make deposits rather than withdrawals' in your 'Emotional Bank Account'.

Your emotional bank account is Covey's metaphor for the amount of trust that exists in the relationships around you.

'Deposits' build and repair that trust, while 'withdrawals' break down and lessen the bond. You should always try to keep the ratio of deposits vs. withdrawals around 3-5:1.

Deposits are the following behaviours:

• seeking first to understand,
• showing kindness, courtesy & respect,
• keeping promises and being loyal to those absent,
• setting clear expectations & making apologies when needed,
• giving feedback (constructive criticism starting with 'I ...")
• and being able to forgive

Withdrawals are the following behaviours:

• assuming you understand,
• showing unkindness, discourtesy & disrespect,
• breaking your promises and having a disloyal bad mouth,
• creating unclear expectations,
• being too proud or arrogant,
• giving no feedback or evaluating someone's character (messages starting with 'you ...")
• and holding grudges

Anyone who has successfully achieved their first step to total effectiveness should be very proud of the transitions of trustworthiness and confidence that they have awakened. To keep your spirits high and hopefully I'd like to share with you a great story that Covey uses as an example of using your emotional bank account...

Why does Private Victory precede Public Victory? A Ghandi Story...
There was a six-year old boy living in the same Indian community as Mahatma Ghandi. This boy had a very strong sweet tooth. He couldn't resist sugar. Because he was diabetic, the sugar created painful boils all over his body.

His parents took him to the doctor, who said the boy must avoid all sweets; otherwise, the ailment would not go away. The parents nagged the boy every day to stop eating sugar, but this was a challenge the boy wasn't willing to overcome.

In desperation, the boy's mother came to Ghandi and asked if he could please convince her boy not to eat sweets. Ghandi said "Come back in 15 days and I';; speak to him then." So the mother came back in 15 days. Ghandi took her son aside and spoke to him for a few minutes. The boy went home and immediately gave up sweets.

The mother was puzzled. She asked Ghandi later, "why did you ask us to come back after 15 days? And what miracle did you perform to get my son to quit eating sweets?"
Ghandi replied that it wasn't a miracle. "When your boy first came to me, I too had been eating sugar." He had told the boy that he couldn't ask him to do something that he, Ghandi, wasn't willing to do himself.

"Who you are speaks so loudly I cant hear what you're saying." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Please feel free to comment about this story or your own achievements in Private and Independent Victories.

Up Next: 'Get in the Habit' of Thinking Win-Win
 

You cant spell Culture without ... Organization?

The third assignment in our Intercultural Communications class is to write a short report, answering several questions about our perspective on Disney's organizational culture.

'Organizational Culture' values,  behaviors  expectations, experiences, philosophy, and values that embody a business or company; and is expressed in its self-image, inner workings, interactions with the outside world, and future expectations.

For your reading pleasure I have posted it here, although I've made some alterations due to confidentiality of my other cast members :)

1) How would you describe the organizational culture of Walt Disney World?

They are very strategic and methodical in their scheduling and production in order to service their guests fully. They care about their workers and guests equally in safety and enthusiasm. They are the leading entertainment business in today’s society. Disney had successfully made a business out of selling entertainment in all forms possible to its audiences.

2) Discuss some of the strengths and weaknesses of Disney’s organizational culture from your point of view.

The company is very committed to the safety of its employees and guests. They want to maintain as much magical show qualities as possible without harming the integrity of anyone involved. They are very engaged within their community and try to be the most diverse company possible. They make sure that all cultures are represented equally within their cast and shows and all people have a chance to work there.

3) Would you say that Disney is able to attract good talent? If so, is that because Disney has a great organizational culture?

 Disney has a reputation of being the best entertainment business. They are also one of the widest accepting businesses ethnically and diversely. This brings a lot of eager talent and people who dream of working for such a high-standards company. You hear minimal scandals or mishaps from the company which gives it a very positive appeal to everyone.

4) Does Disney do things that would enable it to retain talent?

They continually rotate you through all the job roles and locations that you know in order to keep your skills retained. If you request to be trained in another location or role they are also swift to accommodate your requests.

5) Does Disney do things that keep its employees feel engaged when they’re at work? Do they feel engaged?

Disney lets you be part of the magic. You can participate in testing attractions when the parks are closed, they have special times when cast members can visit the park as ‘employee appreciation,’ they have specific appreciation parties once or twice a month, you can enter contests and surveys online to win a multitude of prizes. You have a choice whether you want to work with the guests or cast members or both. You can engage with guests directly and give them magical moments every day or you can engage with your fellow cast and help me a part of making those moments with them.

6) Does Disney have a strong organizational culture which is instantly known by cast members when they begin working at Disney? Does Disney’s organizational culture energize you?

Disney does a great job of letting their core values and expectations be known as soon as you arrive or start working. You go through training, presentations, traditions classes, and are continuously encouraged to provide examples even after you start working and throughout your time there. When you are applauded for special work you have done it is specifically for an example of one of their core values so you are again reminded of what they are. Everything they do or teach is upbeat, up to date and they try to make it seem as interesting and fun as possible.

7) Do you think that you’re able to contribute to Disney’s success in meaningful ways? Are their avenues where you can express your ideas about making Disney a better company?

Disney gives you the chance to contribute to the company. There are surveys being performed constantly in person throughout the parks and online. There are comment boards online that you can put in ideas or thoughts and your managers are always very welcoming with an ‘open door’ policy in helping find a solution or compromise to your problems.

8) Is Disney culture different for the CEO, the Manager, or the full time staff person than it is for you?

I don’t believe there is a difference between job positions when it comes to Disney’s organizational culture. Every cast member has the same expectations in performance, courtesy, efficiency and safety… etc. that all other cast members have no matter what position or location they are in. We all look out for each other and we all work hard to achieve our goals. Disney fully understands that without its cast it cannot perform properly and makes sure that its higher up staff remember that they were once littler and without the littler staff they wouldn’t have an efficient job either. Most of the higher up staff are very friendly and talkative and even help you with your tasks when they really don’t have to.

'Get in the Habit' of putting First things First, Habit #3

The third habit has to do with integrity & execution; the principle being that effectiveness requires the integrity to act on your priorities with discipline & willpower.

The paradigm to think of is not to put urgent things first but to put important things first instead. Your behaviour should be to focus on top priorities, eliminating the unimportant. Also to plan your routines and schedules daily and weekly. This results in increased organization and productivity. A more balances life with fewer crises and a peace of mind. You also earn a reputation of always following-through with your decisions and plans.

"Where you're headed is more important than how fast you're getting there."

The way to put first things first is to think of a compass and a clock. When balancing your life decisions.

The compass represents your effectiveness, relationships and important things - how you manage your time, and with what?

The clock represents your efficiency, scheduling and things you think are urgent - what you feel matters the most and should be used with the compass.

"I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier, they wouldn't have to go so fast." - Steven Wright

The most important aspect I've learned from this habit is how to prioritize. Stephen Covey developed a Time Matrix to help us categorize our daily tasks and emergencies to let us realize how important or unimportant they really are.

There are 4 quadrants of the time matrix that you can prioritize your decisions by... they are chosen by things that are urgent or non & important or not. These quadrants are: Necessity, Effectiveness, Deception & Waste/Excess.

You should try to live your life 'north of the line' taking care of quadrant 1 and 2 priorities first before tackling any from quadrant 3 or 4. Do first things first and the little things will fill in the rest.

Quadrant One are things that should be taken care of first and foremost. These are things like homework, studying for tests and immediate emergencies.

Quadrant Two are second-hand things that can be dealt with but after all your emergencies are taken care of. Things like planning and preparing events or projects, changing the oil in your car or taking the time to clarify your values such as we did in Habit #2.

Quadrant Three can be defined as other's priorities/expectations on you that still must be met. Things like minor assignments or helping to solves other's issues.

Quadrant Four is the final level of tasks that should always be completed last. These are things like surfing the web with no purpose (like on Facebook or Instagram,) watching TV or playing videogames.

Think about all of the things you've done recently; over the past week or so... What are the chronic quadrant Three activities in your personal or work life right now? What are the things you should be keeping in quadrant One or Two but have replaced with quadrant Four?

Please leave any comments with your thoughts, or if you have any tips on how to reduce quadrant Three and Four from taking over.

 

Up next: '...and it's sweet, sweet, Sweet Victory, yeah'... into Independence

Adapting to American Behaviour

The second assignment in our Intercultural Communications class was to write an essay about our observations within 'American culture'. We had to read an article by Robert Kohls about 'American Values' and write an essay agreeing with his chosen 13 values (with examples) or disagree and give new values. For your reading pleasure I have posted it here, although I've made some alterations due to confidentiality of my other cast members :)

* If you are strongly patriotic you may not want to read this - or maybe you will. These are observations I have made about the general population around the 'Disney Area' here in Florida. I do not believe these opinions of every state in the USA nor do I believe these opinions of every individual American within each of said states - don't be hatin' *

Give specific examples of American behaviors that you yourself have observed during the time that you have lived and worked at Disney.

After reading Robert Kohl’s “The Values Americans Live By” article I have created a list of the 10 American Behaviours/Values that I have witnessed or disagree with, during my first 2 months enrolled in the Disney International Program here in Orlando, Florida.

American’s need to focus more on change, always maintain a sense of time, still have a great lack of equality, constantly need privacy, a misunderstood sense of ‘self-help control,’ s strong sense of competition, have an appearance of informality, a strong sense of directness, value practicality & they are indeed very materialistic.

American society still needs to focus on change; specifically the outward appearance and personas of its citizens. Since arrival I have gotten many negative looks when seen with ‘non-afro-Caribbean’ students. Everywhere you go ‘black is black and white is white unfortunately with many afro-Caribbean citizen staying together (at work or personally.) If you are not seen with ‘your sisters’ then you are cast an outsider - and then do you need to be changed.

Many of them still don’t dress very ‘respectively’ for the twenty-first century either. While I was out for dinner with some friends we seen a group of young afro-Caribbean women dressed out in public in a very popular middle-class restaurant looking like ‘they were on their way to the red light district’ so to speak. It is sad to find that in this day and age many still view afro-Caribbean people as lower in status and have to demean themselves to slang and derogatory language and un-classy occupations.

            American’s do have a very strong sense of time. They are always busy or in a rush (even if there is nothing to rush to) and they always have to stick to a schedule.  One of my closest coworkers always needs to follow our scheduling shift track sheet perfectly ‘to a T’ until she can begin to slow down and relax and enjoy work. The track sheets themselves are a good example of how precise American’s follow scheduling and deadlines.

            American’s pride themselves on ‘equality’ but in following my first example of lack of change, they only have specific equality for their own race. Yes they have gotten better at accepting and welcoming other cultures but not as far as other countries. Our Social Security office guard was very prejudice against Italians and French culture. When we went to our SIN card appointment he spent the entire morning discussing his dislike for the arrogant culture and antics of those countries citizens (all after bluntly stating we weren’t supposed to talk during our appointment time.)

            I agree American’s are a very private culture. Phones are always no more than an inch away and password protected. Doors are always closed and locked. Even though all 5 of my American roommates claim to be very friendly, welcoming and approachable they all close their bedroom doors and get anxiously perturbed if the doors are left opened. This might be because Americans try to give the persona of being busy and self-preserved so it would be disheartening to see into such a chaotic or cluttered lifestyle ‘behind closed doors.’

            Many American’s are seen as cocky or conceited because of their strong sense of self. They believe that recognition is always needed and don’t want to complete or help with a task if no recognition or reward will be offered in return. They are individual players that don’t like to share the spotlight with many others. Many of our character performers think and act this way. Not realizing that everyone performers, costuming or cosmetology help to contribute to a show.

            American’s are very competitive. Coworkers compete for the supervisor’s attention. Women compete to win affection from men. Friends compete to dominate the conversation or plan the day’s activities. All these are examples of how competitive Americans can be. I work with some coworkers that like to be right so much that they will interrupt your conversations just to tell you what you already know (in order to smugly listen to their own voice.)

            It is true that many American’s can be perceived negatively due to informality. I work with very many blunt and straightforward cast and performers that have a racial and crude sense of humor. It is sometimes hard to just shrug it off, laugh nervously and carry on with your work. Many of them do give one-word answers or greetings and seem very unwelcoming (until you smile or wave at them and they open up positively.)

            I do agree that many American’s are very direct with their dialogue. Sometimes again to the point of perceived negativity. Many of my coworkers are perceived as bossy or arrogant because of the direct way that they speak or give requests.

            American’s do value practicality. They do not like to waste time and energy on things that won’t give them any benefit in return. Many of my coworkers will not give rides home to ICPs without asking for a shift exchange or favor in return first.

            Finally, Americans are very materialistic. There are specific bus routes scheduled to take you to shopping malls and trolley routes taking you between both shopping outlets. Every American walking by you has a cellphone or other kind of electronic mobile device. Even character performers become partial to a specific kind of costume item or clothing piece that they claim for their own whenever they perform.

'Get in the Habit' with the End in Mind, Habit #2

The 2nd habit involves vision; a mental creation precedes physical creation. Therefore the paradigm for this habit is "I live by design." Meaning that you envision the outcomes before you act and/or you create and act according to a personal mission statement.

As a result of practising such behaviour, we earn a clear definition of our desired results. A greater sense of meaning and purpose. And a criteria for deciding what is and isn't important that leads to improved outcomes.

A way to remember how to 'begin with the end in mind' is to reflect on your impact on others. If you can imagine all of your family, friends and loved ones gathered to celebrate your 50th birthday - what would they say about you? Did you treat them with the respect and love they deserved so that by the time their end comes they will remember and return that kindness? Did you live your live as it came everyday or did you plan every last hour or every year? Did you base your actions and values...etc. on a personal mission statement?

"No one can go back and make a brand-new start, my friend, but anyone can start from here and make a brand-new end." - Dan Zadra

Whether you call them your values, mission statement or anything else, we all have a set of 'fundamentals' that we live our lives by - subconsciously thinking with the end in mind. You rarely act on impulse without considering your 'conscience' or values first... if you think about it.

Your personal mission statement can be private, public, written in a journal, tattooed or painted on a mural in your house. Maybe you just always remember it in your heart and it doesn't need to be tangible. For your class at Florida State we practised writing our personal mission statements... some could be paragraphs, sentences or only a couple words. Here is a version of mine...

1 - To be remembered for my positive contributions...
      - for our rights as equal human beings
      - for our work ethic and daily routines
      - for our various forms of joy
      - for our capabilities to love
2 - To touch someone's life and make them smile or laugh everyday
3 - To never stop learning and educating myself in every way possible
4 - To help break social barriers between countries, genders & men
5 - To prove that determination and a strong will can never be wasted
6 - To help prevent the hardships I've faced to repeat on younger generations after me
7 - To leave this world with no regrets
8 - To be celebrated at my wake, not missed

Your personal mission statement can represent a specific time or time span in your life, or your entire life. It can be revised and redrafted as many times as you move houses or paint your kitchen. As long as you stay true to yourself and live each day with your ideal end in mind.

Up Next: 'Get in the Habit' of putting First things First

'Get in the Habit' by Being Proactive, Habit #1

The paradigm for being proactive is that 'I am a product of my choices' not of my circumstances.

The principle being that 'I am free to choose and am responsible for my choices. Our behaviour should be to pause and respond based on that principle. To use proactive language such as 'let's look at our alternatives' or 'I will choose an appropriate response or different approach."  The result is a greater sense of initiative and self-awareness. Becoming the creative force of your life.

You can choose to go through the motions in life, or you can be proactive and create a future that you want. Become ambitious at work and take on new projects or let your boss know your interested in learning more and helping out. Continue expanding on your education whether it be for personal or professional reasons.

 

Pause & Respond based on Principles

 

Reactive behaviour lets your outside influences (moods, feelings, circumstances - the things in your circle of concern) control your response.

Proactive behaviour gives you the freedom to choose your response based on your principles and desired results. Your freedom to choose expands as you use the space between stimulus and response.

"Every human has four endowments- self awareness, conscience, independent will and creative imagination. These give us the ultimate human freedom... The power to choose, to respond, to change."

Expand your Circle of Influence

Your circle of influence includes those things you can affect directly. When people focus on things they can influence, they expand their knowledge and experience. They build trustworthiness. As a result their circle of influence grows.

Your circle of Concern includes all those things you care about. It's the external factors you worry about such as the economy, fighting or time delays. When people focus on things they cannot control, they have less time and energy to spend on things they can influence.

 

Up Next: 'Get in the Habit' with the End in Mind

Details on Disney! What to pack for Florida State

For anyone who has been accepted into the Disney Exchange program, or anyone who is going to study at Florida State university (in beautiful Tallahassee, Florida) I have made a video for you explaining what to expect.


click above to go to the video!

Let me remind you that it is only for 10 days so be lenient with your packing. Your meals are all provided along with bedding. You receive supplies for class and towels. There's a small walk-in closet for anyone who cant live out of their suitcase and a full desk with wifi. Please watch the video to find out more!

Again PLEASE feel free to leave comments here or on my videos about anything else you would like me to answer during our 6 month stay in the program. As always I will be posting more blogs and videos during my stay in America, so please continue to visit :)

Adapting to Disney Culture

Our first assignment in our Intercultural Communications class was to write an essay about how we have been adapting to Disney life/work since our arrival. For your reading pleasure I have posted it here, although I've made some alterations due to confidentiality of my other cast members :)

 

Dear Diary... How are my first weeks at Disney going? What am I enjoying the most? What have been the challenges?

My first few weeks at Disney have been a whirlwind of emotions and new experiences. I was suffering from separation anxiety during our first night after we all departed for our complexes. For some reason American # text messages don’t come through to my phone so I couldn’t get in touch with anyone to help them move, or unpack, or hangout after we all got settled.

My roommates are all American; which I was highly disappointed at even though I have grown to love them. The first comments they made was that I didn’t have an accent for being Canadian. We’re starting to get along better now; we even went out for lunch together for the first time and took pictures in the Italy pavilion at EPCOT.

I have even finally managed to gain 1/3 of a shelf in our fridge so now I can buy some groceries. Having 5 women share one small fridge isn't easy... They are pretty understanding of my allergy but for my own personal safety I still keep a lot of my non-perishable food in the pantry shelve in my closet, and I cook a lot at other friend's houses so that I can also visit them too.

I bought a rice cooker and am also leaving it at a friend's house; we are all taking turns buying bags of rice and cooking at their house. I’ve become friends with their 2 other French roommates. I recently learned the proper way to cook rice and found out that 'Minute Rice' is a blasphemy among Asian culture. We even had our first sleepover/pizza party with some of the Macau and Canadian girls since coming to Disney.  I'm very excited to meet the July group of Brazilian, Macau and Mexican students.

 

I have fallen head over heels in love with my job costuming at Hollywood Studios. Working at ‘The Show Must Go On’ Character building has been my favourite location so far. Almost all of my fellow cast members are so nice and helpful and welcoming. I’ve made some Hispanic friends, and a fellow Canadian, and a become friends with someone from South Korea and Haiti and some American friends too.

A lot of the character performers I’ve met are nice to me too and I’ve even danced backstage with some of them. I enjoy helping Mickey and all of his friends get dressed everyday (except Wreck-it Ralph could stand to lose a bit of weight and Sully sheds his fur a bit too often.) I’ve always been a creative person and I would give anything in the world to work professionally backstage building props, costumes and set-pieces.

I’ve just started working at the Fantasmic! Show; helping dancers & stunt performers with quick-changes, helping Mickey and his friends get dressed and pre-setting for each show. The performers are very nice and tell me jokes when they’re not on stage. I’m very happy here so far because I used to volunteer at a theatre back home but had to take a hiatus due to school – I’ve missed it very much.

The biggest challenge has been the culture shock in America. It is hard living in Canada as a ‘White kid’ when you have an African-American appearance. Most of the close friends I have still make jokes or comments about it (even if they don’t intend to hurt my feelings.) But coming to Florida has brought a whole new outlook on African-American people for me. Most women in Canada are not as large or thin and don’t ‘dress’ like the general population here. Men don’t try to grab you on the street for your attention and we don’t listen to the same kind of music. Many of the Haitian people I work with expected me to fully understand them when we’re talking and it’s hard to explain to them that I don’t. It’s hard to deal with people passing by glaring at me wondering why I’m walking around with Caucasian or other people not of my Ethnicity (I guess African-American people travel in packs here?) I feel almost compelled by peer pressure to braid my hair because a lot of girls around me have braids or dreadlocks (or they don’t know how to straighten their hair properly and it’s poofy and short.)

I spend a lot of time visiting the Macau girls living at the Commons complex. I've grown to love my big FSU family and I like to always be there for them when they need someone to listen to them or to laugh at.

Doing this has piqued my interest in potentially finding a job in intercultural communications at Disney or any other company where it’s hard to break language, culture and lifestyle barriers within homes and workplaces. Overall I can honestly say that this trip has been well worth the money so far and I’m having the time of my life.

'Get in the Habit' with Dr Stephen Covey

Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of highly effective people; “achieving personal and interpersonal effectiveness from the inside out” explains how you need to improve your own personal characteristics in order to improve your personality. These posts will explain Covey’s theory and our experiences with the lessons we had at Florida State while studying them.

First we start out as dependent; as child to parent, friend to clique…etc. thinking more about ‘You’ but if we work to improve…
(1) Our proactivity
(2) Beginning with the end in mind
and (3) Putting first things first

Then we can achieve our own private victory and gain independence; thinking more about ‘I’. From there if we work to improve…
(4) Thinking win-win
(5) Seeking to understand then to be understood
and (6) Synergy

Then we can achieve a public victory and gain interdependence; thinking more about ‘We’. Finally after improving all 6 habits you must practice (7) Sharpening the saw, because if we don’t keep up with our progress we will become stale and revert back to our old ways.

Character vs. Personal Ethic

Our personality is what people first see about us. It's the techniques we've practised for personal gain, such as influence, persuasion and deceit. But underneath all those techniques is our character. It's made of principles we value, such as courage, justice, responsibility and integrity.

Covey explains how we should use the 'Inside-Out approach' which means to focuss on improving your character and core values before your techniques and effectiveness.

"That we should listen with the intent to teach, so that we learn on a deeper level - therefore when you teach you gain new insights and expand your learning."

Can you see he difference between your character and personality? Or your coworkers, family or friends?

See - Do - Get

Every one of Covey's habits has a principle and paradigm (meaning the expected way that we see, understand and interpret the world.) We 'see' the paradigm, 'do' the behaviour & 'get' the result in turn.

"The results we get in life depend on what we do. What we do in life depends on how we see the world around us."

When you have realized a deeper truth that is strong enough to change your behaviour you have experienced a paradigm shift. Such as being angry at a stranger for not controlling their children, only to find out they just came from the hospital where their mother passed away... Suddenly feeling empathy  for the stranger and realizing none of them know how to properly deal with the situation would be a  paradigm shift... Can you think of a time you ever had a paradigm shift?

Up Next: 'Get in the Habit' of Being Proactive